With so many of us working wherever our internet connection is strongest, the 9-5 day feels antiquated. That's both amazing and extremely challenging. This week, Boston Globe financial columnist Shirley Leung shared her honest challenges with burnout and working from home, and I’ve heard them from you, too. They are:

• The lack of ability to delineate “work” and “home” time

• Finding it difficult to ever shut your brain off

• Difficulty concentrating and a yearning for a quiet place to actually do work

The office, for a lot of us, has become a lot more focused on sociability. Home can be distracting cause there’s just a lot to do at home (I’m looking at you, dirty dishes). How do you stay accountable to yourself and get work done without driving yourself to exhaustion?

There are three modes during a typical knowledge worker’s day.

1. Reacting and responding: Checking email/Slack, checking social media, in meetings, on calls

2. Deep work: I’m at my computer completing a task that requires concentration and thought, like writing. I’m not constantly responding and checking. I do not have meetings.

3. Off the clock: I’m not checking email or Slack. I’m not doing deep work. I’m not expected to respond until the next work period begins

I have found the only way to avoid my brain and days feeling like mush is to define (as much as you can) when I’m reacting and responding, when I’m doing deep work, and when I’m truly off the clock.

Some weeks, reacting and responding work time might flow over a 12 or 18 hour period, with deep work periods scattered throughout the day. Some weeks, I may only get deep work done on weekends or early in the morning. Some weeks, deep work cannot get done because of the amount of reacting and responding time needed. That’s ok. The key is being intentional about your time and letting it all balance out. Here’s what I know after 18 years of working from home.

Reacting and Responding is Important Work

We tend to minimize doing email or responding to Slack as admin that gets in the way of our real work. For most of us, that’s just not true. We need to acknowledge that “traffic” is a huge piece of the modern professional’s life, and we need to value and plan for it accordingly. Reacting and responding in thoughtful and productive ways is a huge piece of my role in client services. That’s part of my value and my “real work.” And so for me, I feel less anxious when I simply acknowledge, “I’m on call, and certain bigger projects might not get done or I might feel distracted for a while.”

If you’re always feeling like you’re mired in meetings or email and “not getting any work done,” it’s time to reframe that. It’s also time for teams to adjust scheduling and project plans accordingly. When people are reacting and responding all day (and night) getting deep work done is impossible-- so something has to give. Let’s set better expectations!

Define Deep Work and Create Rituals For Deep Work

Much of modern knowledge work is built on a Pavlovian system of instant feedback and urgent response. With so many of us working from home and without the normal in-person interaction, we’ve gotten trained to crave the feedback of a “ping” or a visual notification. When we get the ping, we go to work. It’s impossible to concentrate and do deep work when you’re attuned to the next ping.

When I have deep work to do (hat tip to Cal Newport and his excellent work), I’ve learned to acknowledge that I will need to disconnect from meetings, email, Slack, text and social media. My brain is no match for digital media.

To start to de-program ourselves from the need to always be on, we need to practice being disconnected for small amounts of time. Begin with a time limit. Pick an after-hours moment when you don’t need to be online, and then turn off or hide your devices for an hour. Gradually work towards doing this during a workday. For that, select an hour when you can purposefully avoid checking updates (set up an “away” or “in a meeting” notification so people won’t wonder why you’re not getting back to them).

You may also want to find a special place to do work that requires quiet and concentration. Shirley Leung mentioned wanting a “third place” that's neither home nor office to get her writing done. This is a great idea. If a new place isn’t an option, you can use smell, music, or other sensory cues to signal to your brain, “it’s concentration time.” BUT TURN OFF YOUR PHONE. A SCENTED CANDLE IS NO MATCH FOR YOUR PHONE.

Stop Waiting for Someone to Give You Permission to Log Off

When work isn’t a place you leave at the end of the day, it can be incredibly difficult to stop. And let’s face it, when the option is to keep working and feel in control or spend more time on the sofa doom-scrolling, worrying, or dealing with whining kids, overworking might seem even more attractive. But learning to stop work is a discipline that creates good habits and a necessary step to keeping your energy tank filled.

I am an accomplished professional, but unconsciously I still want someone to tell me, “You did a good job today -- you’re done.” Well, you need to learn to give yourself that permission.

Work always wants more from us. And those of us who love our work think we always have more to give. Take a page from the best athletes and rebrand time off into “recovery” time.

I'd love to hear what's working-- and what's not working-- for you when it comes to working from home!

Morra

P.S.: Listen to my interview with Shirley Leung here: