Morra Aarons-Mele | The Anxious Achiever

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One Simple Skill To Make Work Better For Everyone On Your Team

Consider this: You, as a manager, have more impact on your direct reports’ mental health than their spouses do. Take that in for a second.

It’s Mental Health Awareness Month and so many leaders and managers want to make their organizations better for their people’s mental health. It’s a complex issue that truly intersects every line of business. Business leaders ask me: I want my employees to report less anxiety and depression at work. What should I do? I love that people with power and influence are asking this question. There are so many places to start (see my P.S.) but here’s one piece of great advice I can give you if you’re a leader concerned about mental health at your place of work.

Invest in your own self-awareness. Self-aware leaders foster inclusion, belonging, self-efficacy, strong communication, and psychological safety. Bingo- better mental health for everyone, including you.

Here’s a great way to start: Intentionally measure and consider the effect of your actions on other people. As your mom told you, think before you speak.

Dr. Poornima Luthra (She/ Her) suggests this simple practice. "Listen without needing to respond; listen with to understand. Listen to understand how someone might experience the very same environment that we're in in a different way that causes them stress but doesn't cause you stress."

As a leader, I’ve enjoyed the privilege of doing things my way, like avoiding project management tools (which I don’t like) in favor of phone calls. This created unnecessary extra work for some of my team. Over the years, I've also hurt people by assuming they had the same privileged access to resources and freedom to speak out that I did. Working on The Anxious Achiever has given me greater self-awareness about considering others' perspectives before my own.

The difference between being a great leader and just a manager is the ability to listen and truly hear people, to regulate your behaviors and actions so everyone can do their best work, and to use your skills to help others become great. Here’s how to start building better self-awareness. Consider:

  • You may love meetings with lots of brainstorming and boisterous talk… do others on your team?

  • You may thrive on deadlines and high stakes scenarios… do others on your team?

  • If you assume you know how to pronounce someone’s name… are you sure?

  • Are you always talking about how much work you have to do, how little sleep you’re getting, and how overwhelmed you are? What is that telegraphing to your staff?

When I Interviewed him about the crucial necessity of good sleep and how our culture devalues it, Professor Christopher Barnes “I think that your subordinates are always watching you. It's like as a parent, your kids are always watching you, even when you don't want them to be. You are communicating through your behavior how much you value or devalue sleep.”

  • Often we as managers send cues that we don't even realize are totally upending the lives of our team. Maybe we like to email on a Saturday morning, but that means that a team member's getting a message while they're coaching soccer or out on a run.

  • Maybe we forget to communicate a deliverable or deadline and announce it at the last minute (maybe it seems like no big deal to us)… are we unnecessarily disrupting others’ time?

Fixing mental health at work is complex but people are at its heart. Dr. Emily Anhalt told me recently, “Pretty much any and every mental health struggle a person is having is a struggle of relationships. We actually have to be willing to get in there and help people actually feel met and heard and seen and connected.”

What do you think?

Morra

P.S.: Yesterday, I moderated a wonderful discussion as part of a May series on Mental Health at Work with Thinkers50 and Silicon Guild with Rita McGrath, Poornima Luthra and Andrew Barnes. Watch our discussion here: https://www.linkedin.com/events/howtomakeworkbetterforeveryone-7189254300416524288/comments/

I've also been at the wonderful One Mind at Work Global Forum discussing the same. The consensus from research is that effective mental health at work programs are:

  • Strategic and focused on systems change, not just individual benefits or crisis response

  • Intersectional and rooted in inclusion and belonging

  • Cognizant of the need for employee financial security

  • Rooted in good communication

  • Able to give people tools to manage uncertainty

  • Grounded in giving people agency over time, place, and workstyle and and treating them like adults

To get started, check out One Mind at Work ’s approach and their comprehensive mental health index to answer key questions about your workforce’s mental health and create a concrete strategy. Companies with a formal mental health strategy are able to promote mental health more effectively.

P.P.S.: Help people sleep better! Speaking at One Mind At Work’s Global Forum, Jenna Glover , Chief Clinical Officer at Headspace says her team focuses on helping employees sleep better. Because we all sleep. Plus, we all talk about sleep! Sleep is a way into deep conversations and considerations of mental and physical health and “Sleep is the foundation of all health.”

P.P.S.: Learn more on the importance of self-awareness from Tasha Eurich: https://hbr.org/2018/01/what-self-awareness-really-is-and-how-to-cultivate-it