Why does her name in my email inbox make me feel nauseous? (And other things your anxiety is trying to tell you)
Every emotion has a purpose—and your anxiety is trying to tell you something! Last week, Dr. Diana Hill suggested some questions you can ask yourself when anxiety gets in the way and you start spinning negative stories. This week, I want to flip the script and focus on the ways anxiety can offer insight and guide decision-making at work.
I ask my anxiety questions all the time, such as:
- Why does her name in my email inbox make me feel nauseous?
- Why is this project bringing out my perfectionism?
- Why do I dread this meeting and have a stomachache?
- Why does this feel like such a big deal?
- Does this remind me of something challenging from the past?
- Why does this task feel so hard right now?
- What's important to me about this?
Questions like this give me insight, and I hope they make me a more honest, self-aware person at work. If you learn to understand and manage your anxiety, you'll decipher what it's trying to tell you, manage how you respond to anxious feelings, and channel anxiety's creative energy and drive.
Understanding your anxiety is a leadership superpower. (I don't want to sugarcoat anything. Living with anxiety is hard; I know. Clinical anxiety can stop you in your tracks. But here, I'm talking about the daily anxiety many of us feel.)
Your experience of anxiety can be tightly focused on a certain situation or area—a phobia, for example—or it could manifest as a pervasive sense of unease or dread. Anxiety can also sometimes come in the guise of behaviors our society and workplace culture reward: perfectionism, overwork, or excessive concern for the well-being of your family or team. It can coexist with other mental health challenges, such as depression. It can be a constant companion, always simmering on the back burner, or it can flare in response to certain triggers or situations.
The point is, anxiety's forms are legion. It is highly specific from person to person—what causes it, how it manifests in our bodies and emotions, and how we respond when triggered. Building a healthier relationship with your anxiety starts with taking a hard look at yourself and how your anxiety plays out at work. Identifying and facing your anxieties can be difficult and even painful. You may feel that focusing on them will only make them stronger or cause an anxiety attack.
Have faith, though. Decades of research have shown that those who understand their own emotions have:
- Higher job satisfaction
- Stronger job performance
- Better relationships
- More innovation
- The ability to synthesize diverse opinions and de-escalate conflict
Their self-awareness makes them knowledgeable about what affects them, enabling them to prevent anxious situations at work. They're able to respond to anxiety and stressors more effectively for themselves and their team, leading to better outcomes for everyone. Why? They understand themselves and what triggers their anxieties. They have created strategies to manage anxiety instead of just coping and pushing through. They are no longer trapped by acting out automatic behaviors that punish themselves and their team.
It's really quite simple: Leaders who understand how anxiety motivates their behavior and who have developed the skills to manage their reactions are better leaders who deliver better outcomes for their organizations.
So: What's your anxiety trying to tell you?
I believe it's important that every leader and entrepreneur develop the skills to understand how anxiety shows up at work. These new mini-courses from LinkedIn Learning bring the best of The Anxious Achiever podcast to useful, quick courses:
- Harness Your Anxiety for Good
- Managing Anxiety Triggers with Effective Techniques
- Managing Anxiety During Negotiations
Morra
P.S.: I definitely recommend therapy to understand and develop a more helpful relationship with your anxiety!