I grew up in a time when people had to “look the part” to claim authority. "Looking the part" is rooted in so much bias and many negative stereotypes and I'm heartened by how much has changed about how we dress for work. But tons of us are still masking to get ahead.  Masking is “a defensive behavior in which an individual conceals their natural personality or behavior in response to social pressure, abuse, or harassment.”

Your boss might be a menopausal woman. And she might want to talk about it. Nearly every woman of an age I ask is dying to talk about how their changing hormones affect their work lives… and yet it's something we rarely do in the open. It can feel like an "unsayable."

Since 2006 I’ve had a singular vision for my work: I want to look forward to Monday mornings.

For many people, achieving a long-term goal is more important than being happy every day. That is a wonderful quality and I’m sure characteristic of many people who are tremendous leaders and who work to change the world. It’s okay if you’re not one of those people. I certainly am not. And I must tell you, my vision has worked.

“It’s never too late to have a happy childhood,” my therapist once said. No matter how we grew up, as adults we have the power to learn new patterns, and even to heal at work.

My guest Jack Hinman, Psy.D , says, “We're all emotional beings, and knowing your attachment style is a great place to start developing insight into your anxiety, what overwhelms you, or what triggers you. Work is such an interpersonal process that it's going to pull out your patterns.” Understanding attachment styles becomes even more important in times of change, says Hinman, because uncertainty often sends us backwards. Uncertainty is going to trigger your attachment style and influence how you deal with it.

Anxiety can get in the way of our efforts to be the empathetic, thoughtful leaders we want to be. When we're in an anxious state, it's really tough to take a beat, explore the feeling, and react with empathy to another person. We can get impulsive; we worry about getting to the next thing because our threat response is up. We talk too much or over-explain or micromanage. It happens to the best of us.

Every emotion has a purpose—and your anxiety is trying to tell you something! Last week, Dr. Diana Hill suggested some questions you can ask yourself when anxiety gets in the way and you start spinning negative stories. This week, I want to flip the script and focus on the ways anxiety can offer insight and guide decision-making at work.

"I'm bad at math," she told me, and my heart sank. My daughter was upset and anxious about her performance in an upcoming math class. A few days ago, while completing a problem in class, a boy had said, "Why are you struggling with that? It was so easy for me!" This wasn't the first time. My daughter was ashamed, angry, and flustered.

Why is it so difficult to discuss mental health? As leaders, we need to initiate conversations and spread the message that it’s okay to speak up. Thinkers50 experts Amy Edmondson, Megan Reitz, and Peter Sims talk about how it’s done with Morra Aarons-Mele, author of The Anxious Achiever and host of the podcast of the same name.

Why Does Gen AI Make Us Feel Such Strong Emotions?

For the next few weeks, The Anxious Achiever will be looking at the topic of uncertainty, anxiety and fears around artificial intelligence. When I set out to do this in May, the storyline felt straightforward: based on media headlines, the podcasts I listen to, the stock market, TV ads and the global business zeitgeist, AI is a huge existential change that’s coming for us all. It seems like every day there’s a headline that we might - as workers, as creators - become obsolete sooner than we thought. ”Analysis by the IMF, the international lender of last resort, says about 60% of jobs in advanced economies such as the US and UK are exposed to AI and half of these jobs may be negatively affected,” writes The Guardian.

Morra:

If you’re a hIf you’re a high achieving professional, I’d bet passion for your work is a big piece of your success equation. But recent research suggests that unmanaged passion may significantly contribute to burnout, demanding a reevaluation of how we approach passion in our professional lives and how organizations manage their most enthusiastic employees.igh achieving professional, I’d bet passion for your work is a big piece of your success equation. But recent research suggests that unmanaged passion may significantly contribute to burnout, demanding a reevaluation of how we approach passion in our professional lives and how organizations manage their most enthusiastic employees.

“America, hope is making a comeback.” Michelle Obama’s words at last night’s Democratic National Convention captured the sentiment among Democrats right now: “A familiar feeling that has been buried too deep for far too long… the contagious power of hope.” If you talk to most Democrats these days you’ll hear a version of this: “I was feeling anxious, depressed, checked out, hopeless. I felt despair about our future, but then Kamala Harris entered the race for President, and everything changed.”

Depression and anxiety have ruined a lot of days for me. They’ve stolen their share of joy. But I’m a joy fanatic. I can't live without it! The capacity for joy is essential to our leadership and our life. Without joy, you can’t find hope for the future. When you’re joyful, you want to bring others along with you. They can see your vision and they want to come along for the journey.

The permacrisis and accompanying barrage of endless media and political news in the U.S. is stressing everyone out. But what if being in the eye of the storm is your job? I wanted to learn how a political professional manages anxiety. Shaniqua McClendon is the Vice President of Politics at Crooked Media, a left-leaning political organization, where she runs the Vote Save America program. In fact, Vote Save America’s “Anxiety Relief Program” allows people to donate money with the promise their dollars will go to where they’re most needed, and that VSA will work on donors’ behalf… so everyday donors don’t need to stay awake and worry.

What motivates an athlete through years of sacrifice, pain, and extreme discipline? I'm sure it's different for every athlete. On the U.S. National rowing team, my guest Michael di Santo used anxiety and anger as powerful motivators to drive his performance, making it to the 2016 Rio Olympics. In this week's newsletter, we explore the lessons we can learn about channeling emotions for performance.

I'm writing you a special extra newsletter this week to bring more perspective from Dr. Ned Hallowell. Working in the digital age encourages jumping around and lack of focus. It's like living your life with too many tabs open at the same time.

You might be neurodivergent. A lot of us with tricky brains have trouble staying engaged, behaving "correctly," or fitting into systems like school and work. Most systems aren’t made for people like us. We’re bumpy, messy even, and systems are linear — neat and well ordered. Like me, you may have a brain that’s constantly firing on all cylinders, disinhibited, and tough to hem in. But also… freaking amazing.

I recently spoke with Edward (Ned) Hallowell, M.D., psychiatrist, ADHD expert, and author of numerous books including "ADHD 2.0." Hallowell, who has ADD and dyslexia himself, doesn't see these conditions as disorders. Instead, he views them as gifts waiting to be unwrapped.

Resilience has become a buzzword, but what does it actually mean? What does it look like in practice? How do you build it? Renowned behavioral scientist Dan Ariely offers valuable insights into the nature of resilience and practical ways to cultivate it, particularly in the context of job hunting and career setbacks.

We’re very focused on the “I” but in truth, almost everything we do as humans is in response to a relationship or our role in a system. Therapist Kathleen Smith’s insights from Bowen Family Systems theory can transform our approach to relationships, work, and ourselves. Her work has helped me immensely (I lovingly refer to myself as a workaholic try-hard who is always afraid of going broke and letting other people down) shift from blaming myself or other people into examining what’s happening in the system, team, group, or family unit. Listen to this episode- it’s 35 minutes of aha moments and great advice.