Mental Illness Is Not A Superpower
Mental illness is not in itself a redemption story or a superpower. How we manage mental illness can become one. But there are a lot of bumps in the road and cruelties to navigate. A lot of us, myself included, lean on the “superpower” angle perhaps a bit too much, and constantly have to steer ourselves away from glorifying strength and resilience. We have to avoid toxic positivity and solely focusing on redemption stories. It's essential to acknowledge the dangers and hardships while recognizing the potential benefits and lessons that can be gained from navigating mental health challenges. What’s more, people who are out front in telling difficult stories of mental illness often get punished in their places of work.
“I did a LinkedIn post highlighting that I can't get a TSA pass because I've been involuntarily admitted. I posted that post from a place of, oh, hey, I'm bringing this to people's attention, right. For awareness. This is the work I'm working on. And what was shocking to me were the comments like ‘you get what you deserve,’ or "’I wouldn't wanna ride on a plane with you either.’”
That’s my guest this week, lawyer, executive, and mental health advocate Natasha Bowman. I asked Natasha: Do you ever rethink the work that you do? She said, “I do. I mean, even this weekend I was like, okay, I'm done. And then I really started to think back to being back in that place where I felt alone. I felt isolated. I didn't know another Black woman with these professional credentials who was talking about being diagnosed with a mental illness. And I just realized it's important for me to keep pushing on. I come from a family of civil rights activists who faced even more challenging things living in Montgomery, Alabama. So I've gotta continue our generational legacy of doing the right thing, even if it means facing these consequences that are uncomfortable.”
Natasha Bowman entered an inpatient mental health facility in winter 2021. She had fallen into a deep depression during the pandemic. Looking back Natasha reflects, “I had lived most of my life in a Bipolar manic state.” Dealing with mental illness is never easy, but it can be even more challenging when you're in a leadership role. Bowman shared her experiences of facing stigma and the difficulties she encountered when disclosing her Bipolar disorder while managing her health. One of the key issues she highlights is the balance between managing mental health and embracing the instructive aspects of mental illness.
Natasha's journey began with her realization that she had been living in a Bipolar manic state for most of her life. She served in multiple demanding roles at a time, achieved professional milestones, and made significant contributions to the world. However, when the pandemic hit, her life took a downward turn. All her projects were put on hold, and she fell into a deep depression, culminating in a suicide attempt.
Natasha later shared her experience on LinkedIn, and the post went viral. People reached out to her, expressing their own experiences and the fear of repercussions if they were open about their mental health condition. Unfortunately, disclosing mental illness can lead to negative consequences in the workplace. Natasha tells me her disappointing experience as a Chief Human Resources Officer at a behavioral health hospital, where she faced stigma and lack of support upon her return. Assumptions and biases led to misunderstandings, and Natasha faced unfair treatment, damaging her self-esteem and reinforcing self-stigma.
When she returned from mental health leave, the person hired to staff Natasha’s leave remained in the role alongside Natasha. “I noticed that we would be on health system calls, and when they were referred to my role at the hospital, they referred to the both of us. And, you know, it was just very strange. It took me a while to go to my boss and the chief people officer to say, ‘Hey, what's going on? Why is this person still here?’ And they said that she was going to be helping me. But I had never needed any help before. Why do you think I need help now? And they really didn't have an answer. But I think it was just an assumption that, oh, you're coming back from this, so obviously you need help.
Natasha notes that her employer was coming from a good place, but this wasn’t help that she needed. “What would've supported me better was for me to be able to just jump right back into it and demonstrate to myself and others that I'm still the same person and I still have the same credibility and capabilities. But because of their assumptions of what mental illness was, I wasn't able to do that. That really impacted my self-esteem and my self-stigma limitation about myself. Things spiraled and I realized, I can't be here anymore. And it was very unfortunate. I had been there for about five years, very successfully. And I loved my job. And it was very, very hard to make the decision to walk away from it.”
Natasha's story serves as a powerful reminder that mental health struggles are not a reflection of one's capabilities or worth. It is crucial to challenge the stigma surrounding mental health and foster supportive environments where individuals can openly discuss their experiences without fear of negative repercussions. And it’s crucial to invest in your healing.
