Morra Aarons-Mele | The Anxious Achiever

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What is Your Body Trying to Tell You?

“When I was running for mayor, I would get so anxious sometimes. And there were times I had panic attacks before I would speak. I figured out at some point, Tylenol would help settle me down. So I would take two, four, six, Tylenol a day. And I remember my mother saying, "You're going to destroy your liver." And I thought, "Really? I didn't know that." And it had gotten to the point when I would get in the car with my executive protection detail, they would look in the rear view mirror, they'd press the button. The little thing would come up on the console and they kept Tylenol in the car and they would just hand me the bottle….. And so I had to wean myself off. I was self medicating with Extra Strength Tylenol.”

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That’s my guest, Mayor Keisha Lance Bottoms. Bottoms drew a lot of publicity when she announced her decision not to run for another term as Atlanta's Mayor. She’d been in the national spotlight for several years, and President Biden decided to hold his first fundraiser as President in her honor. She was virtually guaranteed a second term but she had a serious talk with herself and those she loves and decided, “Just because I can be mayor of Atlanta again, doesn't necessarily mean that I should be mayor of Atlanta again.”

Bottoms decided she needed to put her emotional and mental health first. She’s candid about the toll the stress of the job took on her anxiety, her body, and her sleep. 

To inform her decision, Mayor Bottoms understood that the toll on her physical health was a signal that the job was hurting her mental health. She even realized that she had stopped dreaming at night as Mayor, and that “When I made the announcement I wasn’t running, I realized I was dreaming again.” People told her that her voice sounded different when she’d decided not to run; her mother told her it sounded “lighter,” and less weighted down.

What is your body trying to tell you?

How are you putting anxiety into your body?

How often do you rely on a drink, drug, muscle relaxant, or over-the-counter pain relief over the week? 

So many of us react to stress and anxiety with our whole bodies. This means that to take action to alleviate stress and anxiety we need to listen to our whole bodies. 

You can start by paying attention throughout the day to what your body is saying.

Physical “tells” can function like the check engine light in our car: they’re the early warning system that anxiety is taking over. 

Anxiety is a total body reaction. You might be familiar with the racing heart and shallow breathing, but it can also manifest in the short-term as chest tightness, clenched jaw muscles, or frozen shoulders. Over the longer term, you may experience GI symptoms, hypertension, skin breakouts, appetite changes, or a marked increase or decrease in energy levels. 

A body scan is one of the simplest and most reliable ways to begin gathering data about how your body processes anxiety. You can even inconspicuously do a body scan at your desk in the middle of a busy day, even in an office with an open-floor plan, making it an ideal exercise for work.

  1. Three times during the course of the day, conduct a body scan. (They can be three times of your choice, perhaps morning, noon, or evening, or before meetings or events.)

  2. Sit upright in a chair with your feet flat on the floor and your hands in your lap. Keep your chin neutral. If possible, close your eyes.

  3. Note which part of your body you feel most immediately.

  4. Scan through the following: (If you like, record yourself speaking each one, and then you’ll have a guided body scan ready to use at any time.)

  • Your head

  • Your jaw

  • Your neck

  • Your shoulders

  • Your wrists and forearms

  • Your upper back

  • Your lower back

  • Your stomach

  • Your hips

  • Your hamstrings and rear

  • Your calves, ankles, and feet

5.  Note where you feel tight, painful, or otherwise uncomfortable.

6.  Breathe into that feeling, into the specific area that feels uncomfortable.You can also visualize the discomfort dissipating. (For example, your jaw unclenching, your heart rate slowing, your shoulders relaxing.) I imagine my muscles melting like butter on the stove.

7.  Over the course of the day, notice how each of these areas feels different with each scan.

Extra credit: how does your body react to certain people at work? Certain meetings you need to take?

By learning how your body experiences anxiety, you can actually get to the root of the problem instead of only treating the symptoms. (I see you, half empty Advil bottle and half empty bottle of wine).